Posts Tagged ‘christianity’

#firstworldproblems

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I tend not to complain out loud about my problems unless I am talking to my mother– since we all know it’s every mom’s duty to listen dutifully to just about everything you have to say regardless of whether you are 25 or 40. If I complain about my issues to anyone else it might sound overwhelmingly like #firstworldproblems, an impression that may only be partly wrong. I called my mom once… –just last week if I’m being honest–in the middle of the night after I hadn’t been able to sleep all night for 3 nights in a row, plagued by my own mental demons, and she picked up. She picked up– even though at that time she was with a patient who would be taken off life support soon.

 

She was just reading a few bible verses to him, and I am pretty sure he couldn’t hear her and was totally unaware of his surroundings or anything else for that matter, but I was shocked that she as a physician was taking time out of doing her rounds to read some verses for a patient that couldn’t hear her and to pray for him before he passed… and also that amidst all this that she picked my call because she was worried about me. I proceeded to tell her I was completely fine, she should get back to work and after I hung up I began to cry. The perspective that the call gave me forced me to tell myself that: hey you should be happy and grateful you’re not deathly ill or dying, and that your problems are so small, and in the grand scheme of things– probably even meaningless.

 

But the truth is minimizing our problems by comparing them to someone with bigger problems can be both helpful and at the same time hurtful. It can invalidate your hurt and your pain and trust me it is incredibly hard to heal from something you don’t fully let yourself feel. If you don’t come to terms with pain in your life because ‘hey there are people starving in Africa and you have it much better than them,’ which may very well be true, but that doesn’t mean that your suffering, albeit privileged suffering, is any less real or any less hurtful. Much of our own life is shaped by our mind–our thoughts, and thoughts can be powerful enough to cause a person to pull a trigger, jump of a bridge, or prevent them from trying to achieve something they have always wanted to achieve.

 

It is good to be grateful and to see life from a perspective other that your own. Be thankful for your privilege. But also be gentle with yourself. Know that it is okay to let the small things sometimes get to you. It’s okay to not be invincible all the time. To feel weak, overwhelmed. It’s okay to simply just let yourself feel. Now it’s another thing to dwell, to sink, to never move forward. But just for today I want you to be honest with yourself about the emotions you’ve been keeping bottled up, the frustrations laying there right under the surface of all the pretense and fake smiles and cheerful demeanor. If you can’t be real to people at least be real to yourself, because honesty takes you to a place where true healing can finally begin.

 

Pity me – Convicted

“When we pity ourselves, all we focus on is ourselves. We only see our problems. We don’t see any of the good things in our lives.”

Smile-Frown Neduzi

Seven Reasons Why Self-Pity Is a Sin (C.Fitzwater)

  • Self-pity is a refusal to accept trials as a test of faith, thus inhibiting our own growth toward maturity and completion in Christ.  (“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.  Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete…”  James 1:2-4  NIV)
  • Self-pity demands that  you are entitled to a certain quality of life that has not been promised to you in Scripture.  (Jesus says, “…In this world you will have trouble.”  John 16:33  NIV)
  • Self-pity dilutes your compassion for others, as you elevate your own suffering to a place of prominence.  (“…be compassionate…”  1 Peter 3:8  NIV)
  • Self-pity is married to grumbling and complaining.  (“Do everything without complaining…”  Philippians 2:14  NIV)
  • Self-pity ousts gratitude.  (“Be thankful.”  Colossians 3:15  NIV)
  • Self-pity fills your time with useless whining and moaning instead of prayers for help and rescue from the Almighty God.  (“Call upon me in the day of trouble…”  Psalm 50:15  NIV)
  • Self-pity will only accept joy that comes from reversal of circumstances instead of joy that comes from the Lord.  (“Rejoice in the Lord always…”  Philippians 4:4  NIV

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“Each day is a special gift from God, and while life may not always be fair, you must never allow the pains, hurdles, and handicaps of the moment to poison your attitude and plans for yourself and your future.”

 

Where is God

This year I have committed to read through the Bible chronologically. Today’s passage comes from Job 17:

“My spirit is crushed, and I am near death. The grave is ready to receive me. I am surrounded by mockers. I watch how bitterly they taunt me. My eyes are dim with weeping, and I am but a shadow of my former self. My days are over. My hopes have disappeared. My heart’s desires are broken. I might go to the grave and make my bed in darkness. And I might call the grave my father, and the worm my mother and my sister. But where then is my hope? Can anyone find it? No, my hope will go down with me to the grave.”

We all know what it is like to feel hopeless. In the midst of our circumstance, sometimes we see no way out. We have no help. We have no joy. We question God’s presence in our lives. We forget how He has led us in the past.

But whenever I am reading Job and find myself questioning God: I quickly skip to the end of the story. I skip to God’s answer.

Job 38:

“Then the Lord answered Job from the whirlwind: “Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorant words? Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell me, if you know so much. Have you ever commanded the morning to appear and caused the dawn to rise in the east? Have you made daylight spread to the ends of the earth, to bring an end to the night’s wickedness?”

Our God is a great God. We may not understand our circumstance. But its not ours to question God. Instead we trust His ways, which are above our own.

“Sometimes we ask God to fix things, that He is not going to fix. Change things that He is not going to change. We ask Him to move things that He is not going to move. He may not change your circumstances, but He will give the grace to bear it. He may not move your problem, but He will give you the grace to stand it. God may not take you out of the fire, but He will be a thermostat in the furnace, so that the flames of trials and despair will not scorch you, but refine you into pure gold. When there is no way left for you to try, when all your plans have failed, and you see no way of relief, God says: Here I am. My strength is made perfect in your weakness.”

God is still God in the middle of your trial. He will never leave you or forsake you.

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